The Jens Lekman Incident.
Greetings from Onlinistan.
Regarding the tricky process of artists making good decisions.
Ghaddafi, Sheen and the Collective American Punishment.
Regarding eucatastrophes and Kevin Smith.
The plan for 2011.
Regarding "Walden," Lincoln Park, and middle-aged hippie pussies.
Converting pipe dreams into actual dreams.
In which I come to realize that I'm kind of high-strung.
And now the story can finally be told.
My Summer of Museums.
What the electronica industry can teach us about the future of literature.
Random notes.
The month of returns.
The exotic appeal of crappy British television.
Patience, Cane Boy!
Two entries in two weeks? That's redonkulous!
He's alive! Barely.
Time again for a little fortune-telling.
Regarding podcasts, 'Girls Gone Wild,' and the neo-monk lifestyle.
Here's what I'm doing this summer. Um, it's a lot.
Is "Lost" the "Ulysses" of television?
Self-portrait at forty.
Introducing the "wikicloud" theory of amateur historical research.
What is so far officially my favorite embarrassing old college photo yet posted by an ancient friend rediscovered at Facebook.
Another Saturday, another afternoon of global cultural inhalation.
Regarding the demise of television and my new "Grand Unified Theory of the Arts."
The end of Bushism. Thank God.
It's here. It's finally here.
Er, surprise; I've started writing poetry again.
And yet even more on this little mini-space I've been having pipe dreams about.
More on my fantasy theoretical bookseller/CCLaP shared commercial mini-space.
I confess: I've been obsessed with the Beijing Olympic Games.
Regarding why it's so important to regularly have rosy dreams.
The suburbs. The horror.
Regarding high-def Olympics, old-man beer, and CCLaP's newest project.
Chicago at 14.
I've got sex on the knee. Er, brain.
I've been feeling like a horny teenager recently. And that's not necessarily bad.
It's my birthday. I'm not exactly thrilled about it.
Jason, meet sexual tension. Sexual tension, Jason.
Welcome to the Distributed Life.
Notes from the social contract which is society.
I created a new phrase: "Global Singular Disorder."
It's true -- Chicago 2007 is a Victorian science-fiction dream.
Happy, sad. Happy, sad. HAPPY, SAD!
How to make money from nothing. Seriously.
In which the westside parks bring up the age-old question: Are idiots born or made?
Here we go. Again.
Dreaming of a green St. Louis.
On being one of those annoying "your body is a temple" fucks.
Oh yeah, that's right, it takes time to recover from surgery.
In which I finally discover a destination for horny webcam sluts.
Lynch Triumphant: Or, an Apologia for Surrealism, inspired by a recent viewing of "Inland Empire."
Greetings from beyond the Aether.
Six books down, only...44 to...go. Shit.
Regarding thinktanks, the "Rapid Infrastructure Challenge," and stupid fucking Americans.
Random notes.
The Hussein Tape: Does this change everything?
Celebrating nine years of horseshit.
Regarding 'Obamania' and the forgotten moderate majority.
Random notes.
My morning with Tatum Reed.
Hey ho, it's version 12!
The unexpected pleasures of being a virtual jaded reporter.
More frustrations. Another new plan. Sigh.
And here's what else is going on with me.
Time to get back to work.
Some bad news that took awhile to announce, and why it took awhile.
Smartass marketing, and "The Subject That Shall Not Be Named;" the latest with MetroProper.
Delicate geniuses and making the doughnuts; another week at MetroProper.
Regarding hiring, firing, and other bigshot internet-startup executive stuff.
The Saga of MetroProper; the Ballad of Wendell the Great.
And here's what else has been going on with me.
It's open. My arts center is finally open.
Regarding the surprisingly up-and-down life of a moderate pragmatist.
Holy crap, my first Second Life sex event was hot.
Paying the bills with cartoon sex.
The plan is finally coming into place.
Dispatches from the real world.
Sex versus desire: the real life/Second Life conundrum.
The ebb and flow of the Second Life day.
The many loves of the omnisexual.
On being a slut in the virtual world.
Regarding the tricky subject of etiquette within Second Life.
Greetings from Second Life; wish you were here.
More about what's been going on with me.
Okay, so the real reason I'm scaling back this journal.
I'm thinking of scaling back this journal.
On hiatus.
I'm in Rogers Park again.
Do satirical geniuses necessarily have to be dicks?
I have some new announcements concerning my arts center.
The future of the arts - an opposing viewpoint.
I've been thinking about Jesus recently.
That's right, I said that artistic non-profits are dying.
Regarding micropayments and "micro-economies."
A mysterious hero from my past suddenly re-surfaces.
Good Lord - more about Second Life!
Field report, part 2: My first weekend in Second Life.
A "walk" through my proposed Second Life sex club
Field report: My first weekend in Second Life.
Singing for your supper in the virtual world.
Random notes.
Ah, cybersex!
More regarding "the conversation."
Random notes.
Once that ball starts rolling...
And the name of my new arts center is...
Regarding reader feedback and "the conversation."
[randommedia] Why not send me an audio comment?
PixPulse: Portrait of a company that gets it.
The Jason Pettus Widget
Random notes.
I have lots of little announcements for you today.
Regarding the "magic middle."
My day with Adobe; my evening with Yahoo.
[randommedia] Interview with Adobe's Greg Rewis
You control your technology. I cannot emphasize this enough.
Look at all the crap I got accomplished this weekend!
Guess who finally has a home internet connection?
[randommedia]: My first Odeo recording
No, seriously, the last about my new arts center.
Who is Nikki Patin, and why should you care?
More about my arts center, the "lite" version.
Introducing my arts center - the "lite" version.
So much work. So little news.
Random notes - the 'sick as a dog' edition.
The Mighty O strikes again.
The Heterotopia Report for January 27.
More regarding Germany and nationalism.
Those angst-filled Germans are at it again.
I was dreaming of the arts center again.
To Pluto...and Beyond!
The Heterotopia Report for January 17.
My surprisingly emotional weekend.
Regarding novels, memoirs, and "The Truth."
Look at all that new music!
The Heterotopia Report for January 10th.
Das Audio ist hier! Das Audio ist hier!
Field report: Marshall McGearty Tobacco Lounge, Chicago.
Regarding the ARG as social experiment.
Odds and ends.
Happy 2006!
Scratch, mash, rip, burn.
More random notes from St. Charles.
Random notes - the St. Charles, media-rich edition.
[randommedia]: Conversation with my brother, St. Louis, Christmas 2005
Viral marketing - when will the madness end?
Greetings from St. Charles...again.
Random notes.
The Heterotopia Report for December 20th.
Regarding decentralized social networking.
Random notes.
Regarding addiction and my own life - the final entry.
The Heterotopia Report for December 13.
Even more about 'hyperlocal' websites.
More about 'hyperlocal' news sites.
Regarding the future of paper news.
I get colder and colder with each passing year.
The Heterotopia Report for December 6.
Introducing The Heterotopia Report.
Random notes.
[randommedia]: Conversation with my friend Anna, karaoke night, Chicago
Sean Stewart is way cool.
I had a fun weekend.
Random notes - the St. Charles edition.
More about addiction and my own life.
Addiction - the story can finally be told.
Let the holiday season commence!
More about Bob Crane and co-dependent relationships.
Some thoughts about 826 Chicago; some thoughts about Bob Crane.
More about information.
Concerning information.
Ahh...Ellen.
More thoughts about utopian societies.
I've been thinking about utopian societies.
More thoughts about Middle-earth.
My pathetic descent into Middle-earth.
[randommedia]: Conversation with my friend Anna during a Halloween party, Uptown, Chicago
Doo-ooh wee-OOH, wee-OOH, wee-OOH!
Random notes.
What a surprise - more thoughts about OSX!
Oops, hi there!
Ladies and gentlemen, please meet Poppy.
Hey, how 'bout that, I'm back in Chicago.
Notes from a roadtrip.
What a weekend!, day 2.
What a weekend!
[randommedia]: Conversation with my friend Alamar, Chicago Metra train ride to Fermilab
Regarding Fermilab and the kindness of strangers.
Odds and ends.
Alamar's trip - a report from day 6.
[randommedia]: Report from an impromptu party at my apartment, 3:30 a.m., Uptown, Chicago
[randommedia]: Conversation with my friend Alamar, Chicago el ride
[randommedia]: Sidewalk conversation between bars, Belmont and Clark, Chicago
Penises! Here's what women think of 'em.
Bike adventure: Uptown to the end of Lakeshore Drive.
Odds and ends.
This might be the most pointless entry I've ever written.
Whatever happened to Great American Disasters?
Random notes for September 2nd.
How do you entertain a German for two weeks?
Happy BlogDay!
Regarding the old-skool pleasures of newsletters.
Random notes for August 30th.
Odds and ends.
Dear podcasters - you suck!
[randommedia]: Interview with Meg Bell of the Chicago Mudqueens
A few thoughts on "organically grown" companies.
Field report: "City of Destiny" reading at Quimby's.
Field report: Lillstreet Center.
Odds and ends.
[randommedia]: "City of Destiny" report, part 1: Talk with my friend Jenna, Wicker Park, Chicago
[randommedia]: "City of Destiny" report, part 2: Smoke-break monologue, Quimby's Bookstore, Wicker Park, Chicago
[randommedia]: "City of Destiny" report, part 3: Interview with Jonathan Messinger
[randommedia]: "City of Destiny" report, part 4: Talk with my friends Kate and Joshua
[randommedia]: "City of Destiny" report, part 5: Talk with Katherine Hodges
You want radical ideas? I got yr radical ideas!
It's raining! No field trip! Boo!
Three subjects; three thoughts.
Another slice of humble pie, dear?
I had a busy Friday.
[randommedia]: Field report from the Chicago Small Business Expo, UIC Pavilion
Greetings from a much-needed gloomy day.
A few thoughts on 'rehirement.'
An open letter to the Lakeview Borders.
Random notes for August 8th.
Overwintering.
Yeah, but where are the singing waiters?
I hung out with my friend Mars last night.
Random notes for August 3rd.
Odds and ends.
Getting Things Done - a progress report.
Regarding the tribulations of getting pitched.
Okay, which one of you assholes told Jessa Crispin about me?
I met a whole bunch of bloggers last night.
Random notes for July 26.
Bicycling in Chicago - a progress report.
In praise of stupid dogs.
I hung out with the Mud Queens last night.
This site: CSS spec downloads
God help me, I'm Getting Things Done.
Regarding CRM, SEO, and other MBA BS.
Fuck you! I'm a rebel!
More tales of GALLERIA.
I've got an idea for a new group literary project.
Oh, did I not mention GALLERIA?
The Transition Year - a progress report.
Welcome to version 11.0.
Random notes for July 11.
Greetings from the Grand Switchover.
More on what exactly terrorism is.
Good Lord, in two parts.
Good Lord, part 2.
What the Irish can teach us about George W. Bush.
Random notes for July 6.
[randommedia]: Conversation with my friends Tom and Lisa, on Tom's moving day
Bike adventure: Uptown to the Loop.
But what about the artists, Jason? WHAT ABOUT THE ARTISTS?
Only one day until my first Chicago bike adventure!
More on the business issues The Obvious People just don't get.
Bicycling in Chicago: A few beginning resources.
I do what I can, and that's all I can do.
Site development notes for June 28.
Heat wave!
Postmodernism can really wear you down.
God, no wonder I've been such a prick lately.
Random notes for June 24.
Yet more updates from my life.
Nextfest: A final thought.
Live from Nextfest: I've been fired!
Live from Nextfest: Day 1
I'm going to Nextfest tomorrow, and I'm trying an experiment.
Site development notes for June 20.
There's been other things going on in my life too, you know.
Site development updates for June 17.
How do I create great sidebars for my blog?
Damn, I've been updating at the new website already.
Concerning the extraordinary and hidden power of blog databases.
Site development updates for June 14.
Public beta 0.1: Updates for June 11th.
June 11 updates, continued.
Public beta 0.1 - there are many updates to report.
June 10 updates, continued.
The Grand Switchover of 2005 just took a big step forward.
Announcing public beta build 0.1.
Photoset: A walk down Lawrence Avenue, May 2005
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[randommedia]: Conversation with Katherine Hodges, Quimby's Bookstore, Chicago
[randommedia]: Interview with GapersBlock.com's Andrew Huff
Will the old men in the back of the room please raise their hands?
[randommedia]: Report by my friend Shappy of Star Wars Celebration III (part 1 of 2)
[randommedia]: Report by my friend Shappy of Star Wars Celebration III (part 2 of 2)
[randommedia]: Shappy poem, "The Soldiers Took My Babies!," Live in Chicago
Random notes.
Regarding the bisexual dilemma in the straight-man world.
Amber Frey deserves love too.
The pope is dead.
Do cities have souls?
Trouble, old-skool.
[randommedia]: Meg's party, part 1 of 4: Bike messenger Raphael
[randommedia]: Meg's party, part 2 of 4: Retired Israeli soldier Josh
[randommedia]: Meg's party, part 3 of 4: Novelist Adam
[randommedia]: Meg's party, part 4 of 4: Porn star Daniele
Tagging - the next great form of communication?
Regarding Wil Wheaton, trackbacking, and the 'grid life.'
A few thoughts regarding blogs in the workplace.
What the Pope can teach us all about simple human dignity.
Introducing [metafeed].
Random notes.
I'm thinking about writing a wikibook.
Regarding Enterprise and the tricky problem with franchises.
More thoughts on how we gather information these days.
I'm finally learning some things about RSS.
Why is it that I suddenly know all this stuff about Disneyworld?
Guess who just got a Flickr account?
It's not dangerously cold! It's not dangerously cold!
A few thoughts regarding great screenplays, Bill Murray, and getting old.
I've got some new pictures from Germany.
The philosophy of marketing; the marketing of philosophy.
All hail the business plan...thank God it's finished.
Happy new year!
So.
Announcing the new arts center, part 2.
Announcing the new arts center.
Frankfurt - the story ends.
Frankfurt - the story continues, day 4.
Frankfurt - the story continues, day 3.
Frankfurt - the story continues, day 2.
Frankfurt - the story continues, day 1.
Frankfurt tour, day 8.
Frankfurt tour, day 7.
Frankfurt tour, day 5 (Cochem and Amsterdam).
Frankfurt/Cochem, day 4.
Frankfurt, day 3.
Frankfurt, day 2.
Frankfurt, day 1.
Oh yeah, I have a journal, that's right.
Goodbye, UK and Ireland; hello, Frankfurt.
One week until the tour has to be cancelled.
Historic election, historic Olympics, historic report.
Viva la mud-wrestling, part 2.
Viva la mud-wrestling!
Random notes.
[book] Chicago Stories 2001-2004
[story] That summer I dated that couple
More about anger; more about hate.
There was some excitement in my apartment building this week.
I'm digging for fire.
Wireless internet notes.
Orgy, orgy, orgy. Well, almost.
Media notes.
Ex-girlfriend woes. Again. Fuck.
Dude, what is up with Illinois Republicans?
Photoblogs: Garth and Dave's party; Madison Wisconsin.
Grr - when am I going to start updating regularly again?
Photoblog: Lewis and Clark bicentennial.
Oops, I did it again.
More about the military.
In defense of the US Army. No, really.
Did I mention I'm writing a new novel?
Ah, the Brew-N-View.
Jason Pettus, urban gardener.
I just learned about ubiquitous computing this weekend.
Long live the amateur programmers.
I met with the British Consulate yesterday.
I had a surprisingly traditional Easter weekend.
Guess who got a Treo 600?
Catching up, part 2.
I wish I didn't get sick so often.
Odds and ends.
I went to a burlesque show this weekend.
A few notes on the interfaith movement.
I went to a comedy improv show this weekend.
My friend Kate came over last night.
I went to the Newberry Library this weekend.
Nasty!
A few thoughts on Angloporn.
He's alive!
Ken and Jack and Carol and Tim and Beth and Liz.
CSI: St. Charles.
Greetings from beautiful St. Charles, Missouri.
Yes, okay, I'm moving the website!
The Wachowski Brothers cash it in.
Looking for love in all the wrong places.
Perpetual war.
It was a pretty good weekend.
More post-tour plans, plus thoughts on being a Euroweenie.
Post-tour depression; post-tour excitement.
Goodbye Germany. Hello Chicago.
Cochem part 2, plus side trip to Wiesbaden.
Bonn. The hidden jewel.
Munich day 5, plus side trip to Regensburg.
Munich, days 3 and 4.
Munich, day 3.
Munich, day 2.
Munich, day 1.
Tour break: Cochem, days 2 and 3.
Tour break: Cochem, day 1.
Transition: Giessen to Koblenz.
Detour: Giessen, day 1.
Berlin. Disaster.
Transit - Duesseldorf to Berlin.
Duesseldorf, day 2.
Goodbye, Frankfurt; hello Duesseldorf.
Frankfurt, day 2.
Greetings from Frankfurt!
Hey, thanks for not threatening to kill me.
Getting drunk at Wrigley Field.
Sonderweg (or: You Know, That Subject I'm Not Supposed To Bring Up).
Another unwanted history lesson; plus, readers' biases revealed!
More on the scam which is world history.
I miss you. Yeah, and you too.
Das land der mitte.
The town and the city.
It came.
Ordnung muss sein!
Der Sexuellklub.
Regarding language barriers and poetry readings.
Well, there's no going back now.
Only $50 to go for my plane ticket!
I went bowling with *Ben and *Jennifer last weekend.
Random notes.
I heard from a bunch of old college friends last week.
The Paypal account is working well.
My Paypal account is finally working!
I'm giving myself one more year.
I mailed my 350th resume yesterday.
Media notes.
I'm falling for a couple.
Oh yeah, I mentioned a new novel, didn't I?
Why no, I haven't gotten back into my routine yet.
[story] TelevisionGirl
[story] An ode to 'Mental Graffiti' on the occasion of their last show
[story] Eulogy for Defiant Theatre
Sorry about opening up all those wounds.
Regarding Nirvana and growing the hell up.
Whew!
Greetings from St. Charles, Missouri.
I partied with a bunch of flight attendants this weekend.
International travel, one damn dollar at a time.
I made out with a couple last night.
Entry #1000.
"Okay, Chicken Little!"
The fall of the American Empire.
My parents were in town this weekend.
Summer's here...damnit.
A guest report from Paris.
Odds and ends.
My ex-lover was in town last night.
Whew!
The good news and the bad news.
Lucky Wander Boy.
Oh, the lonely burden of the sex columnist!
A few thoughts about being on the dole.
Sorry you haven't heard from me in awhile.
I had a Henry Miller weekend.
Well, it's official.
75 percent relationships.
Wow, was I sick this weekend!
Hey, Paris readers!
I wrote a letter to my ex-girlfriend yesterday.
Comics and Handsprings and coffee - oh my!
Jason Pettus, super secret slam coach.
I mean it this time - 'Slut Summer' is almost here.
I'm walking and I'm typing.
An ex-lover is coming to visit me.
Be Your Own Iron Chef: making the most of your leftovers.
Holy shit - I had a job interview.
I have a secret crush on you, England!
The Transition Year - month four.
I've been thinking about the army recently.
One of my readers has been writing about me.
Like the new look?
I'm at Uncommon Ground.
I've started applying for ESL jobs.
The shock, the awe, the videophones.
I was supposed to meet up with a swinger tonight.
I had visitors last week!
I tried out for a reality television show today.
Happy birthday...sob...to me...sob...
I applied for six jobs today.
God, I'm so broke right now.
Jason Pettus, beefaholic.
I went on a date last night.
Viva la Wi-Fi!
I got an answer to my book.
That girl I like is here again.
I'm at the Hideout.
I threw up at the poetry party.
I got a piece of mail addressed to my ex-girlfriend.
I had six teeth removed today.
The space shuttle blew up this weekend.
I filed my taxes today.
I'm at an intellectual fundraiser.
I went over to Garth's today, but he wasn't home.
I now know what pain is.
I finally figured out why I liked "Fellowship of the Ring" so much.
I got drunk and called an ex-girlfriend tonight.
I read something interesting about Taoism today.
Another day, another bag of trash.
That girl at the bar keeps touching me again.
If you're reading this, it means my journal is still on hiatus.
My day at the family reunion.
Random notes.
"I smell like Wal-Mart."
Why Christmas is like pickled ginger.
Hobbits, Pixies and porn - oh my!
Regarding depression, the holidays, and those pesky suicidal thoughts.
Happy holidays!
Wisconsin road trip, part 1.
My day in Dogtown.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Jason's Adventures in Suburbia, day 2.
Greetings from St. Charles, Missouri...
Micropayments - the next Edsel?
Hide your daughters - Jason's becoming a professor.
Oh, great, the protesters are here.
Election day!
It's a great time to be alive, isn't it?
What a difference an article can make.
My night at the movie shoot.
The tragedy of Bob Crane.
She's alive!
Guess I'll have to write this on the fly.
I'm on a mission.
I went to a new open mic last night.
So the exhibitionism night was a success.
*Alexis and I are having a fun week.
*Alexis got into town yesterday.
I'm in a very good mood tonight!
Hey, you like the new look?
Damnit, I still need to write my Sleater-Kinney book.
Push!
I want to smack my co-workers silly.
Gearing up for Nanowrimo.
Neko Case, where are you?
Colonial New York.
New York - my morning/mourning at Ground Zero.
New York, Day 1: Empty airplanes and crowded art galleries.
New York guest essay.
Well, so much for the daily updates.
A special report from our (soggy, stranded) man in Prague.
I've decided to start updating every day again.
Special report from the middle east.
How am I? I'm processing, thank you.
[story] Sonnet for a heavenly body
[story] A poem for willow, who is now my ex-girlfriend
[story] Concerning 'Yammer' and the inherent contradictions of poetry open mics
Travel journal - readers respond.
Would you pay five cents a day to read this journal?
Another random weekend.
Nomad relationships.
Notes from the lake.
I've been a nonsmoker for four days.
I'm going to New York! Um, I think.
This meeting of Nerd Club will now come to order.
Jesus, it's hot today.
The problem with getting on with your life...
Why I'm not writing this week, and why you should check in anyway.
Journal on the go.
Jason Pettus, Master.
The amusing and sometimes erotic tributions of a boring couple who likes freaky-ass sex.
The amusing and sometimes erotic tributions of a boring couple who likes freaky-ass sex.
I've got a crush on you!
Contemplating Michelle M.
Damn you, Shappy!
More on CSS, plus why I like the Loop.
Goodbye, Netscape (or: the Great CSS Debate).
Random notes.
A special report from Israel.
Holy shit, I got a job.
1, 2, 3, 4, this is who I'm voting for.
Paving the information superhighway.
Love, web-journal style.
I come bearing gifts.
Updates, updates.
I've been doing a lot of writing lately.
The Southern Gothic Tour 2002.
The chocolate party.
A different kind of public nudity.
The Slacker Chef.
2001 - bah!
Now the story can finally be told.
I miss my girlfriend!
The beauty, the horror, the mall.
Fear and loathing in suburbia.
So here I am...in Missouri...again.
willow's got a dick.
A message for all my college readers...
Chris Columbus can kiss my ass.
A conversation with my girlfriend.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Too...many...toys...
Greetings from St. Charles, Missouri.
Sexual fantasies - readers respond.
Fantasies versus fantasies.
Repeat after me - sit down and get some writing done.
The thrill is gone - thank God.
Oh, hi there!
Thinking about ex-girlfriends, part 2.
I've been thinking about ex-girlfriends recently.
Chez Mia and the Birthday Girl.
willow, part 2.
willow.
I'm in a funk.
A great, great Saturday night.
Someone's coming to visit me.
My dinner with Garth.
Random notes.
Nigger (and why you shouldn't be afraid of words).
Ghost World (OR: "Dude, I know that guy").
Happy anniversary.
[story] Snowmen
[story] A poem to myself on my 32nd birthday
[story] An ode to the 'We Should Be Famous Club' on the occasion of Yammer's fourth anniversary
[story] Anyway: a poem for two voices
Journey Beneath the Center of the Conquest of the Planet of the Apes.
Regarding professional help.
Anatomy of a party.
Odds and ends.
I got married last night.
I got married last night.
"7th Heaven" and why I still sometimes question my faith.
Why has A.I. failed?
What I did before I did writing.
Me and Hope and Faith and beer and pot and a camera.
Why you should go see "Baise Moi." NOW.
The rest of the weekend.
The Party Game.
Little things.
Are our children seeing too much porn?
So are you ready to sell out?
Black-light bowling, high men tell no tales, and yet more dreaming of Europe.
The flu?!
Who killed Evan Chan?
Film-o-rama.
A few friendly tips for budding pornographers.
Jeez, I hate writing resumes.
I saw Steve Jobs this morning!
Ha ha, part 2.
Ha ha - I'm going home with her and you're not.
Oh no! I'm an ugly American!
"You have to go to Casablanca."
Fallout.
Dreaming of Europe, part 147.
The spectacularly boring life of a novelist.
Starfuckers Reunited Tour 2001.
A very enjoyable week.
Off to St. Louis.
What it's like to be by yourself.
These are the times that try men's souls.
The nail in the coffin.
Tension mounting...
A change in plans.
Drinking beer and uploading porn.
Nanette, Taylor, and why the poetry scene really stinks sometimes.
The Temp Blues strike again.
A little taste o' Europe.
A little Hope and Faith never hurt anyone.
Transitions, transitions.
Now that's porn!
New job, old friends.
The Mia Fan Club.
And a better day.
Not the greatest day.
Another victim of the Bush recession.
The California List of Fives.
California diary - Sunday and Monday.
California diary - Saturday.
California diary - Thursday.
California diary - Wednesday.
California diary - Wednesday.
California diary - Monday.
California diary - Sunday.
Ugh.
Holy shit, I'm hungover.
It's my birthday - treat me like a rock star.
I heart Patricia Smith.
The sex club is back on.
Hallelujah, preacher, I can hear again!
"You have to come watch me pee now."
Brain...still...fuzzy...
A bed and breakfast for slackers.
Stalking George Clooney.
I like Sara Smiley.
Pass the apple pie, and shut the fuck up!
Stephrok watches Twin Peaks.
Another Sunday, another beautiful comedian.
Represent, Jason, represent!
My el buddy was on the train again today.
I have absolutely nothing interesting to talk about today.
Slacker confesses: "I love the XFL!"
Manipulative or just drunk? You make the call.
Another day, another root canal.
I almost asked two women to come home with me last night.
The internet is dead...thank god.
Finishing up the weekend.
Man, I blew some money this weekend.
Readers speak out.
Random notes.
Blackmail!
The other reason I'm going to San Francisco.
George Bernard Shaw, drunk hippies and Bloody Marys.
So why did I compete in the poetry slam last night?
Chatty pig (or: How I learned to stop worrying and love the zine).
My weekend, part 2.
I saw naked women this weekend.
Regarding the military and the arts.
The good news about the coming recession.
My mom is such a dork.
Wait a minute...I'm HIV negative.
Repeat after me: You are not going home with anyone tonight.
Voodoo butter!
I don't care if you have green hair - you're still uncool when you sit in Starbucks.
Me and the Great Books.
Happy holidays.
Random notes.
Coup!
Yeesh, it's cold.
The stupidest election in American history.
Check it out.
Glorious snow! Er, I mean - Fuckin' snow!
The rest of my weekend.
Well, the bad news is...
Out of commission...again.
Not what I expected.
Finally, a couple of good days.
I've been thinking a lot about porn lately.
Medication + airports = Ahhh!
Guest host -- Thursday.
Guest host -- Wednesday.
Guest host -- Tuesday.
Operation...success.
Anther slam, another loss.
But what about my Venti Cafe Mocha?
Another movie weekend.
Should we keep the Electoral College?
More about tympanomastoidectomies than you ever wanted to know.
Ah, Columbia - part 2.
Ah, Columbia.
Missouri, here I come.
I stand corrected.
I'm in love. Again.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, a quick impression.
Halloween past.
Rage...subsiding...
My body hates me.
I'm utterly unmarketable.
Work = dysfunctional family.
Oh no, I'm singing out loud again.
Well, goddamn.
Our overseas friends speak.
I came, I saw, I IKEAed.
What did I think of the vice-presidential debate?
Another night at Joyblue...sigh.
I'm drinking by myself again.
I love 7th Heaven!
Here's an actual dream I had this weekend.
Simple pleasures.
I am the NRA (Napster Revolutionary Army).
I hate my fucking ears!
Odds and ends.
Announcing the Pillow Book.
I can't believe it actually worked.
Survey results, and a report from Rome.
To degrade or not to degrade - that is today's question.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, a little self-loathing.
Welcome home, Douglas.
Rule number one: do not talk about Nerd Club.
I don't want to talk to you!
CSS is a big stupid fucking mess.
Notes from my brother's wedding, part 2.
Notes from my brother's wedding.
Wedding blues.
What to say when there's nothing to say.
"Jason" is a delightfully messy new font.
Kubrick-palooza.
MSG and THC.
Okay, so maybe I'm lousy in bed.
All signs pointing south.
Playing hooky.
Girls throw lousy singles parties.
Al Gore made me cry like a little girl.
Well, it ain't exactly the dog days.
She made a lot of sense.
Cooldown.
National Poetry Slam -- Sunday.
National Poetry Slam -- Saturday.
National Poetry Slam, Friday.
New York diary -- Wednesday.
New York diary -- Tuesday.
New York diary -- Monday.
New York diary - Sunday.
[book] Chicago Stories 2000
Happy anniversary.
[story] You fuck like Sleater-Kinney
[story] Way of the drunken warrior
[story] Untitled (time is a fucked-up concept)
[story] Untitled (roommate story)
[story] Tempe
[story] A poem for Ellen, who in a moment of weakness asked for one
[story] Open letter (Theo)
[story] Open letter (Mike)
[story] Open letter (Katie)
[story] Open letter (Kathy)
[story] My name is Jason Pettus and I am not your ex-boyfriend
[story] Manifesto of the obvious
[story] The man who masturbated without using his hands
[story] The legend of the tower people
[story] King of the losers
[story] Jason Pettus is one bad motherfucker
[story] Jason Pettus is one bad motherfucker
[story] I didn't go to Prom
[story] A day without caffeine
Nobody likes me!
The sublime beauty of stupid people.
Our delightful neighbors to the north.
Regarding cute girls and bullshit justifications.
Regarding correspondence.
Letter to J. (dominance and submission).
So, here I am at Madbar.
Well, I had a fun weekend.
24 confessions about sex, part 2.
24 confessions about sex.
A profound reminder of why I love books.
So, here's version 5.0.
Odds and ends.
Flirting with FITALY.
Gay sex or masturbation machine? Part 2.
Gay sex or masturbation machine? That's the question.
Pretending to be a journalist.
And the rest of the weekend.
Notes from Ohio.
I'm so glad I don't have internet access at home right now.
That guy was in the convenience store again.
Palm makes their first mistake.
Odds and ends.
My penis was asking about you last night.
Real poets don't go to Prom.
You're getting sleepy. You're getting very sleepy.
I've been having action-adventure dreams.
I took too much speed last night.
I've got comics on the brain.
My chair's all squishy.
I had a fun weekend.
5 a.m. and nothing to do.
Day jobs.
I know that creepy Snickers panda guy.
If I were a girl I'd be in a punk rock band.
Starfuckers unite!
Letters from Iceland, part 3.
Scalpin' tickets at Wrigley Field.
Letters from Iceland, part 2.
Anatomy of a come-on.
Whatever happened to the Harlem Globetrotters?
Sick and sicker.
Letters from Iceland, part 1.
Southside in the house?
Welcome, AvantGo subscribers.
Art shows in hotel rooms.
Check out this cool photo I found.
Date-o-rama.
ILOVEYOU.
Laura Ingalls redux.
Goodness gracious, I was drunk last night!
Panic in the streets of Chicago.
Porn in the mail!
Random notes.
No, I'm not dead.
Phantom Menace is here! Phantom Menace is here!
John Dean - what a pissant.
Off to the doctor again...
31 and feeling fine.
7 for 13.
The agony and the ecstasy.
I have nothing to say today.
"Oh God, you're going to write about me, aren't you?"
Man, I hate doctors.
So I'm writing this new story.
Heaven knows I'm miserable now.
California Diary -- Saturday.
Dude, it's the same woman.
Since when did I get so used to the city?
I'm so glad I'm not 30 anymore.
I got drunk with twins last night.
I call them Hipster Weekends.
It's time for the ol' mailbag.
Dave Eggers - now HE'S a rock star.
Tempe, Day 3.
Tempe, Day 2.
Dear Patrick and Carrie: The leather jacket was a hit.
Good grief.
Look out, Dr. Carter!
Douglas Coupland is obsessed with me.
Masturbation -- I stand corrected.
I wonder if I masturbate too much.
Boy, am I drunk.
"Titus" is one fucked-up movie.
The obligatory shout-out to my homey.
So, I've started a new project.
"Charles, Charles, stay up and wait. And if you do, I promise you, it'll be worth the wait."
I can't write a diary.
Snow, snow...fuckin' snow!
I gotta stop hitting on married women.
Sometimes I feel like a robot.
Hey, I'm performing tonight.
So much poetry, so little time.
I could be sterile and not even know it.
Cleaning my apartment is becoming a futile endeavor.
It's weird to be a consumer.
New Year's Eve was a blowout.
Man, I've been reading some interesting books lately.
Why have I not updated this site in awhile?
Oh yeah, winter sucks, now I remember.
I have rediscovered my love of humanity.
Sick!
Okay, okay, so I had sex last night.
Some people just ooze a sense of authority.
Simple pleasures.
Greetings from St. Louis.
There's this really cute girl with a black eye on the train today.
Most people are unthinking, lazy idiots.
Here's a letter I received today.
I've invented a new word: INTERCRUSH.
The bathroom at work has a shower.
I'm thinking of Missouri today.
SimpleText is my new best friend.
SimpleText is my new best friend.
[book] Chicago Stories 1999
[book] The Heatseeker
[story] You are all the Prozac I need.
[story] Yet another small poem for DG
[story] The world ends in 422 days
[story] We are the sum of everything that has come before us
[story] strangeplastikrobot
[story] She Number One and She Number Two
[story] One of those moments
[story] An obscene poem for my new lover
[story] The mod kids
[story] Mean and hateful poems
[story] me&thegirls&theporn&thedildos
[story] Maddie, the queen of internet pornography
[story] The love of Jacques
[story] Littleton
[story] A little story about my last temp job
[story] Jedi mind trick
[story] Jayne and Dana, Dana and Jayne
[story] Jane the Geek
[story] I wish I could start a poem by doing this
[story] Eight haikus concerning the last night of 'Pow'
[story] dynasty
[story] Brandon, king of the world
[story] Bitch and moan
[story] 47 words spoken on an el
[story] 12 ways that my ex-jobs and my ex-girlfriends are much alike
[story] The Tunnel
[story] The Girl With the German Thighs
[story] Princess
[story] 1982
[story] Unabomber
[story] Synchronicity
[story] The Heatseeker
[book] Chicago Stories 1998
[book] Jasonettes
[story] You and I will never love again
[story] The wonderful thing about poets
[story] Wedding haiku (a found poem)
[story] Untitled (suicide poem)
[story] There's something about a girl in uniform
[story] There oughta be a law
[story] Taking a lover
[story] Take me out (to the ballgame)
[story] Satisfaction remains (a found poem)
[story] The real, real, real, real world
[story] Poems I'd write for Nike if Nike ever asked me to write poems for them
[story] Opera night
[story] Now that I don't have sex
[story] None of the above (a found poem)
[story] My girlfriend (a found poem)
[story] My fourteenth day
[story] Margo says
[story] Lewinsky
[story] Lance Burton died for your sins
[story] Jason's Manifesto 4.15.98
[story] I wish I were a machine
[story] Guggenheim
[story] Getting in touch with my pain
[story] For Lisa Hemminger on the occasion of her 38th birthday
[story] Five short poems inspired by Shag
[story] Eleven thoughts that will get me a penny from Amy Krouse Rosenthal
[story] The dirty violent little things you have done to me (and the other dirty violent little things you have yet to do)
[story] deathwish
[story] Crush on musician #1710
[story] Christmas story, 1998
[story] Checkmate
[story] Blue Velvet
[story] Arkanon
[story] And this is the poem
[story] Albuquerque
[story] 10 oh one this morning
[story] Yo la tengo
[story] The echoes we refuse to admit
[story] Swimming sharks
[story] Reaffirming my faith
[story] The night I killed myself
[story] How to write a Jasonette
[book] Chicago Stories 1997
[story] What really happened between the end of The Empire Strikes Back and the beginning of Return of the Jedi
[story] Well, Steve Albini was nice to me
[story] The very first time I ever performed at the Green Mill poetry slam
[story] Typing on keyboards in bars
[story] Two minutes to talk with Jack Kerouac
[story] They can have my Macintosh when they pry it from my cold, dead fingers
[story] Skylab is falling, the chicken told me
[story] Sitting in the coffeehouse now
[story] She's eating a bagel
[story] Scraping the sky
[story] Princess my princess
[story] The potential, the kinetic
[story] Poetry on the el
[story] An open letter to Jerry Springer
[story] The only homeless person I've ever given money to
[story] The night we pretended we were married
[story] Missouri dreams
[story] A man
[story] Jokes my grandpa used to tell me
[story] A job I'd really like to have
[story] In Excalibur
[story] I wanna be your spleen
[story] How to tell you're about to turn thirty
[story] How dare you, Mr. Luplow
[story] A found poem that demonstrates my lack of faith in humanity
[story] Down with the pigeons
[story] The dog who loved too much
[story] Chicago mantra
[story] Celebrating with dignity
[story] Blah blah
[story] Ballad of the battles lost
[story] All the dykes
[story] All the dykes
[story] 175113
[book] Chicago Stories 1996
[story] You got the blues, boy, is what you got
[story] Written while in the middle of the flu
[story] Why the flies aren't
[story] The Village Idiot Competition of 1996
[story] Vent!
[story] Untitled (vice story)
[story] Things I have never told another living soul
[story] Supervillains.
[story] Jerry Garcia is dead
[story] In my world
[story] I saw Jason Pettus
[story] Hello, sports fans!
[story] Spring fever
[story] Her name is Rachel and last night I had a dream about her
[story] She was right -- God, she was so right
[story] She rubs her chest
[story] The guy who said fuck a lot
[story] Saint Jason Day
[story] Exorcism
[story] Prayer from an atheist
[story] The power
[story] Describing silence
[story] opium.com
[story] Dear Miss Manners
[story] An open letter to Mr. Monaco/Acton
[story] The day I turned gay
[story] Chicago
[story] Ode to a bad poet
[story] Branson, Missouri is a really bad place to throw up
[story] My things and your things
[story] My date with Liz Phair
[story] Missed connections
[story] Letter written on an airplane
[story] Letter to my unborn son
[story] Letter to Liz Phair
[story] Letter to a possible lesbian
[story] Learning to fly
[story] Lazy crazy hazy
[story] Bob Barker's Pussy Wagon
[story] Lazy crazy hazy
[story] Kathie Lee Gifford likes to fuck!
[story] Kansas City Falling
[story] Jimbo, the duck who sold out
[story] The absolutely true story of my ten-year high-school reunion
[story] 1984