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(UPDATE: For those reading this through the RSS feed, Giff Constable of the Electric Sheep Company [promoter of the Ben Folds event] has responded to my criticisms here in the commenting section. By the way, I got that email Giff talks about, explaining that there was going to be a techno dance set for 90 minutes before Folds' appearance; that still doesn't explain, though, why a 90-minute techno dance set was added to this event in the first place.)

Okay, I admit it, I was excited; I found out a few days ago that I was going to get a chance to meet Ben Folds, one of my musical heroes. And that's because the label he's on, corporate powerhouse Sony BMG, is in the process of opening their own island in SL right now, and had hired him on to do an in-world promotion for them, playing tracks off his upcoming album and basically "hanging out" with the 50 or so people who were lucky enough to win the media lottery the promoters held. And I was one of the people who won the lottery; so yes, I was excited.

But then for some reason, the event actually started over at the new 'aloft' hotel instead (itself the brainchild of a major RL corporation, Starwood Hotels), a full hour and a half before Folds was scheduled to show up, basically a dance party for a bunch of journalists who didn't want to dance, and who all kept asking why they were being kept waiting an hour and a half to begin with. And the promoters didn't seem to have much of an answer either, other than to keep insisting that the dance party wasn't a pre-event but a part of that night's event, although it was never really explained what 90 minutes of high-energy techno dance music had to do with uber-slacker pianist Ben Folds, being spun by a non-Sony DJ using non-Sony music.

Now in RL, the solution to such a dilemma is obvious; simply slip out of the club, go smoke a joint in the alley behind it, get a bite to eat, then come back 90 minutes later and try to pick up a drunk A&R rep. Ah, but see, the promoters had overbooked the event as well, meaning that if you left there was a good chance you wouldn't be able to get back in. And then admittedly, when you combine my low-end Macintosh with the continual crappy service the grid has been pumping out over the last two weeks or so, it now takes me nearly 15 minutes to fully rez a mere 128-meter view; and that makes me hesitant about leaving any location anymore while there, knowing that it will take so long to render once I come back.

So I stayed. And watched "Ugly Betty" on TV with one eye for an hour while keeping track of the dance party with the other, making sure I wasn't missing anything. Watching the avatars at the party drop one by one into sleep mode, eventually becoming a room half-filled somewhat filled with shoe-gazing zombies. And thinking how torn I was by doing this article in the first place, given just what a horrendous track record Sony BMG has now, when it comes to malicious and customer-hostile so-called "digital rights management" software, or DRM. Of how many times they've now demonstrated their willingness to screw their own customers over, in the name of trying to maintain a draconian control over their intellectual property. And how they don't really deserve to have yet another article out there written about them, even if they were bringing somebody to SL who I really wanted to meet.

And then finally, two hours after the event started, Folds showed up. And it was at this moment that my Mac finally decided to crash. And then it was at this moment that your intrepid reporter became so angry, he seriously almost put his fist through his computer monitor, and so decided for the sake of his own welfare to turn off his computer instead, and go have a drink in RL Chicago. Which is what he did.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the story of the night I almost met Ben Folds.