Well, she managed to do it again; Oprah, that is, managed to pull off something not a single other person seemed to be able to. That is, she duped James Frey into being on her show again, then proceeded to tear both him and his publisher new fucking assholes on live television. Oprah! Punk Rock Queen of the Universe! Putting on the pressure exactly where it's needed, when no one else in her position will! And has single-handedly managed to get the entire conversation back on the track it should've been - of how wrong it was for him and his publisher to try to pull this over on the public in the first place, and not what exactly constitutes the 'truth' anyway and whether or not we need to redefine the word 'memoir.'

And now certain smartypants out there are wanting to make fun of Oprah for doing such a thing; and I say to that, fuck you, too, because Oprah managed to do something legitimately amazing that none of you managed to accomplish, which was to back those weasels so far in a corner that they had no choice but to admit the simple truth ("We lied, and then tried to cover it up") or else look like complete asses. And in this world of 'truthiness' and questions over whether certain laws are actually 'legal,' this is a damn rare thing to accomplish, to actually get one of these people backed so far in a corner that they have no other option but to admit the ugly truth. And for that Oprah gets my deep respect, and also an entire entry from me today defending her, and arguing why she's worthy of your respect too.

I mean, sure, what these smartypants accuse her of is true; she used the incredible power she wields to basically hold a one-hour bitch session on live television, about how embarrassed and duped she felt by standing behind this book so strongly in public. But those who want to make fun of this are entirely missing the point; that it's for this precise reason that she has 30 freakin' million middle-aged women who worship her. Because Oprah at heart is nothing more than a middle-aged suburban woman too, and thinks the same thoughts as those 30 million other middle-aged women, and has the same opinions, and is interested in the same things. When Oprah declared how embarrassed she was by recommending this book to others, she was literally stealing the words out of the mouths of my mom and her friends; only in their case it was their circle of ten personal friends they recommended it to, not 30 million strangers and the entire Starbucks corporation.

But see, here's the important thing; even if it was just ten friends, these women's embarrassment was no less passionate nor intense than Oprah's embarrassment over 30 million. And Oprah understands this, which is what makes her so brilliant; that underneath the brouhaha and the shaking of entire industries that has come with "The Grand Oprah Swindle of 2006," beats the heart of a middle-aged suburban woman simply pissed off that she's been embarrassed in front of her friends, that she held a whole special book club and everything, just to tell everyone what a courageous story of determination this young misunderstood man's real life was. So hell yeah, Oprah, call him to the carpet for it on live television; because all you're doing is fulfilling the dreams of 30 million other pissed-off middle-aged suburban women, smacking their fist in their other hand and muttering, "Yeah, I'd love a chance to tell that little son of a bitch how I feel too."

So then there's this other meme that's been making the rounds as well about the whole Oprah Ass-Reaming, which is whether or not Oprah learned a 'lesson' from her previous experience involving Jonathan Franzen. (A nutshell recap, for those who don't remember: Oprah picked Franzen's The Corrections for her book club; Franzen remarked in public that maybe he didn't actually want to be in her book club, implying that Oprah's endorsement was an intellectual insult rather than compliment; Oprah says, "Fine, fuck you, you don't have to be in the book club;" Franzen apologizes, says the press blew it all out of proportion; Oprah shuts down entire book club soon thereafter.) And so I guess it really depends on what your definition of 'lesson' is; and maybe the two situations are so dissimilar that a question like that can't even be asked. That said, however, here is I think an interesting interpretation of that question, and of what 'lesson' Oprah might have learned about it all (which is just a theory, mind you, my theory, not based on anything Oprah has actually confirmed in public):

It could be argued that Oprah perhaps originally shut down her book club directly because of Franzen, and because his unintentional insult really shook her self-confidence over sponsoring the book club in the first place. And the argument, of course, would be that Franzen was able to crash into that place where a lot of critics are never able to reach, inside of Oprah's actual head, to get past all those publicists and fans and media professionals and image consultants, and really get her mind ticking in a deep way. Because let's face it, Oprah is most likely a very intelligent person, and in my life I've learned that very intelligent people never get that way without a whole lot of self-examination, self-questioning, etc. I would bet that Oprah still really prides herself on not surrounding herself with yes people, with remaining critical and skeptical about the world, willing to take risks and challenges on her show, and still have her audience follow her. If I imagine this about Oprah, it seems very likely to me.

But Jesus, being Oprah, I imagine it's almost impossible to get away from all of that, the adoring fans and adoring press and all those people being paid to be nice to you; and especially in the case of her book club, because that's been just such an overwhelming, unstoppable juggernaut of a force on the publishing industry, and with so many people so happy for so many reasons that she's encouraging tens of millions of suburban middle-aged women to read challenging literature, when otherwise they wouldn't even be reading fluff literature. So in my argument, Franzen is the very first one in this environment to break through the Oprah Fog of Love - this author she obviously adores, who she can't stop talking about, who is completely unlike any other author she's recommended before - and basically says, "Jesus, Oprah likes my book?" Then rolls his eyes dismissively and quietly changes the subject. And this gets through, see, and suddenly Oprah's asking, "How many other people are feeling that way about my book club too? Lord, have I built a Fog of Love around me, so that I can't even see my own projects with clear eyes anymore? Maybe this entire book club has been a joke; maybe it's not this great thing, and with all this power and influence, like what everyone's been telling me."

And so, it could be argued, this is why Oprah shut down her book club right after the Franzen Fiasco; because she was embarrassed, shaken, not sure what to believe anymore. And it could also be argued that when she started the book club back up, this is why she first went with only classic literature; because she didn't even want to deal with the issue anymore when it came to contemporary authors, but to simply stick with writers who others have already said are worth praise. And so maybe if Oprah learned any 'lesson' from this that she then applied to the Frey situation, it would be this - that she did get a chance to step back, look at the situation objectively from an outsider's perspective, and realize that ultimately her book club actually was a good thing, even if there are still flaws to be worked out. And not only that, but that she has every right to be recommending little-known contemporary authors, based on no other criteria than that she likes them, and that she has every right to have an opinion like that and to have it matter, because she's a human being and therefore has a right to be treated as intelligent.

This is what makes Oprah so great, after all; that she's not just out there rehashing the same goddamn 'classics' that 95 percent of all those other suburban middle-aged women are, but actually getting excited about new things, new issues, new artists, and getting her audience turned on to those things too. Oprah wouldn't be Oprah without this; nobody would watch her show without this; so it's ridiculous for her to give this up when it comes to the book club either. And so the real lesson, I guess, is that she learned it was okay to say, "I was duped too, and I'm embarrassed by it, and pissed off, because I consider myself a pretty smart woman otherwise, and think I deserve an explanation for why I was led on like this. And I'm Oprah, goddamnit, so I'm going to get an explanation, you little asshole." And this has led in the last couple of days to Doubleday finally issuing a public apology for the entire debacle, when their modus operandi P.O. (pre-Oprah) was to say, "Heeeeeey, what's the truth, anyway, maaaaannnn? Isn't, like, everything the truth, from a certain point of view? Maaaaannnn?"

So, Oprah, my hat is off to you, dear madam, and I'm sorry for all the cursing today, ma'am, I truly am. Say what you will about Oprah, but give her this - she's out there, and every day she's tackling things that truly and personally fascinate her, and if people won't let her do the things she wants to do, she says fuck it and does them on her own instead. And she's not afraid to fail, sometimes spectacularly and in public, and always owns up to her failures, which makes her successes that much more dramatic and profound. And the last time I checked, you know, that was the very definition of the DIY attitude that so many of us independent artists and software developers and entrepreneurs live our lives by. So yeah, Oprah gets my informal respect and this formal Apologia I've written today (which is a new word I learned last week, by the way - yay for learning new words, one of my favorite simple pleasures), and I don't care who the fuck wants to snicker at me for such a thing. Hey, you go out and convince 30 million people to read the new Franzen novel. When you've done so, come back and maybe we'll have a conversation.

Hey, so I had this interesting experience this weekend, that I wanted to share with all you theatre people, because I found the whole idea really smart and something I think a lot of other artists could benefit from...

Yesterday I was hanging out at Dollop Coffeehouse, in the Uptown neighborhood where I live, as I am wont to do. And I was getting ready to leave and was saying goodbye to Katie, one of the baristas there who I know from my time in the poetry scene, when she suddenly invited me back to the place at 10:00 that night, to check out a free preview of a new play that's about to open here in Chicago. So I did go back at 10:00 last night, and invited my other poetry friend Kate as well (not to be confused with Katie, the girl who originally invited me). And it turned out that it was this play called "Kama Sutra: The Musical," and that the producers had done what I thought was this really interesting thing: that as a way to build buzz about the show, they had actually put together a stripped-down cabaret version of the play, which they're calling "Kama Sutra: The Quickie," which they are then performing for free at various cafes and clubs around the city, and providing free wine as well. (UPDATE: I did, in fact, get this wrong; the Dollop show was the only free one they did. The show is now running at Davenport's and costs money to attend, although less than the full musical will.)

Wow, what a smart idea! Because let's face it, the chances are most likely that I would've never gone out and seen this play on my own at a traditional theatre, even during previews and even if the preview ticket was free; but hey, if it's taking place two blocks from my house? At a place I hang out at all the time anyway? With free liquor to boot? Well, sure, hell yeah I'll attend something like that, simply because I've wasted so little of my life if it turns out to suck; I mean, shit, I don't even have a train ride ahead of me if I want to go home early. It's the first time, frankly, that I've seen an artistic group here in Chicago apply the lessons of the "Web 2.0" to a physical project here in the city, and is something I think a lot of other artistic groups could benefit from contemplating as well.

In case you were curious, by the way, the play itself is hilarious; or, well, "hilarious" if your idea of a fun time is a completely bawdy cabaret show about this nerdy repressed couple, who use the Kama Sutra to spice up their sex lives, then sing really funny songs about everything they're learning. (For example, my favorite song was the one where the man explains to the audience how not to get a venereal disease, appropriately enough entitled "That Little Thing On Your Lip.") And how interesting is this, by the way? The guy who wrote and produced the show, who was in attendance as well, is the same guy who wrote the 1984 Jerry Falwell fake ad in Hustler magazine, which led to Hustler getting sued by the US attorney general, and which eventually inspired the movie The People Versus Larry Flynt. (And he confirmed something else, by the way, that I've suspected for years now; that all those fake ads in Hustler in the '80s were basically complete ripoffs from Mad magazine, which the staff of Hustler were apparently huge fans of back then.)

Anyway, so there you go - proof positive that such an experiment will get people talking about your artistic project, both to their friends and to the public at large. And now what are you going to do with such information?